Bookish Rants

The Secret Problem That Kills Heroes (a rant against heroes in romance)

Saraina Whitney

Warning: this will be a bit, shall we say, roasty. So take all this with half a grain of salt.

the secret problem that kills heroes

Today, I want to discuss THE NUMBER ONE THING most likely to make me lose interest in a hero when I open the first page of a romance novel.

(Well, it’s not always the first page, per se. But most certainly the first several pages. But that’s largely irrelevant.)

It is the universal problem of romanticizing your heroes.

In my opinion, this is one of the key things separating unique, refreshing romances from inauthentic, flat romances.

When all you want to do is write a feel-good romance, nothing more and nothing less, the most natural thing in the world is to make your hero this perfect, swoony guy you really have to squint at to catch a tiny flaw, which then is usually a fake one like being forgetful or something trivial. Something entirely not damaging to his hot male lead persona.

I’m so tired of it.

Stop writing about your heroes as if you’re fangirling over them at the same time! Look, it happens to me sometimes. I’m like, meh, I don’t want to say that because it doesn’t exactly put my boy Ean in the best light…NO. DO IT ANYWAY.

I’m here to encourage us all to GET REAL WITH OURSELVES. Your hero does not – should not – be The Perfect Guy™ for your reader to love them. To love him is to truly know him. Go far deeper – beyond outside appearances and cute quirks they have – to their heart. Who is your hero? Deep behind that charming smile and those sparkling green eyes?

Don’t be afraid to smear some mud on them. (Not the rugged, manly kind. I mean…repulsive stuff. Real stuff. Whatever that means for your character.) Don’t be afraid to have your hero DO UNGLAMOROUS THINGS. Things that aren’t stereotypically attractive! If that’s what being real means, then layer it on.

They can still have a large element of swooniness, yes. But don’t sacrifice actual, messy character development work for that picture-perfect hot male lead. We have enough of those.

I want a hero who embarrasses himself sometimes. Whose ears look kinda funny turning red. Whose quirks are genuinely weird. Who doesn’t always come across in the way he intends. Who doesn’t always have the most poetic thing to say.

Who is a human.

I know, I know, this is basic advice every writer learns sooner or later. Every character needs imperfections and a fatal flaw and weaknesses, blah, blah, blah…

But it can never be repeated enough.

Treating your character as a fangirl object only cuts away at the the power the character can hold.

Let your readers do that. You? It’s your job to know your character, know him beyond as a hero.

Don’t fall into the trap so many writers have and just churn out been-done-before, meaningless romances without heart and soul.

Your readers, I promise, will thank you.

Your love story will be defined by genuine relatability and realness. It will be unique and refreshing.

Disclaimers – What I Am Not Saying

I am not saying that I don’t like swoony heroes. I’m not saying your hero has to be ugly. I’m not saying your hero can’t have sparkling green eyes and a charming smile (trust me, I won’t complain if that’s the case).

And most importantly, I’m not saying you’re doing anything wrong.

I’m merely venting my frustration from too many excerpts read from romances I don’t even have any desire to finish reading.

And turning the rant into a blog post is just a win-win situation, so don’t judge me okay

Oh and by the way, if you have not encountered any of these kinds of romances, bless your heart. keep doing what you are doing.

I just hate fake, and I know you do too. We want romances that ring true to real life. And if you know me, you know I not-so-secretly love dramatic plots that aren’t all that realistic; so what I mean by that is I want characters who tie all that drama down to reality with their real, raw relatability and imperfections.

The point of this post is to encourage us all to start or continue writing our strong, refreshing stories with well-developed characters that lay the bedrock for the romance. Believe me, your readers’ bookshelves need it.

Give your heroes fears.

Give your heroes goals.

Give your heroes insecurities.

Give your heroes dreams.

Give your heroes wounds.

Give your heroes a heart.

Is this…just me? Or have you also noticed the prevalence of shallow, over-romanticized heroes in romance? Who are some of your favorite heroes who are both swoony and actually feel human?

35 thoughts on “The Secret Problem That Kills Heroes (a rant against heroes in romance)”

  1. I wholeheartedly agree! Yes! So true! Love this Saraina!
    Hmm, favorite heroes…um, Drew Carter from The Wars of the Realm Series (there’s a touch of romance) um, Carter from IRON and Denton from KEY…and there are definitely more but I can’t think of them at the moment…lol…

    I like to think Malcolm is well rounded…he has a big fear that his friend Ben loves to make fun of, and Lord knows Malcolm is very far from perfect…lol…though I do sometimes wonder if Iya comes across as perfect? Hmm…that’s something I might need to work on…

    Awesome post, Saraina! I loved it!

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    1. Thank you so much!!!! 😀 *high five* Oh my, I JUST got the first book in that series from the library and I can’t wait to read it! Augh, yes, I love Carter and Denton so much!!! Haha, yes! Those are great choices XD

      Oh girl, I’m sure you have! He sounds like such an amazing character! 😍

      Aww, thank you, Kayti! ❤

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      1. Ack! You must let me know what you think! I adore the series and am rereading it right now! Glad you agree with my choices! *bows*

        Aww, thanks! We shall see…lol…

        ❤

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        1. I’ll definitely let you know what I think! You and your sisters have mentioned it so often, I’ve been meaning to read it forever! I’m so glad I finally got it!

          Haha! 😉 ❤

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  2. YES!!!!!! *applause* this is one of the most common reasons I get bored with books! we do need more human, imperfect characters. I was actually thinking about this yesterday. Great post, Saraina!!! 😀

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    1. Me too!! YES. The ones who actually have struggles are my favorite kind because of how relatable they are 😅 Thank you for reading, Grace! 💕

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      1. Exactly, and there’s another thing I was thinking about. In a lot of books, the female character is either strikingly gorgeous, or she is plain. If she Isn’t either of those, it says so… very clearly. I notice this in a lot of L.M. Montgomery books. By the way, both the Anne series, and The Witch of Blackbird Pond are some of my very favorite books.

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        1. Wow…you’re so right. 😂 I guess because of that, I’ve grown to appreciate if the heroine is plain, but at the same time, there’s often still an emphasis on it. *gasps* Ahh you love The Witch of Blackbird Pond too?? I absolutely love that book!!! Kit and Nat, and Hannah and Mercy…just such lovable characters. 😊

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                1. LOL! Yes, I didn’t! (To be honest, I feel like it’s a little different for the main character vs a side character – the side characters can get away with less flaws because the story isn’t directly centered around their specific conflict! 🤣)

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  4. Jonathan: Why’re you looking at me like that?

    Nicki: Oh, no particular reason…Mr. Grumpy Hermit.

    Jonathan: *grumbling* I’m not a grumpy hermit… anymore…

    I honestly don’t remember the-oh wait. Actually, no, I don’t remember the last time I read a perfect male character. But some of my favorite imperfect male characters come from Kellyn Roth’s and Michaela Bush’s books!

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    1. LOL! Girl, I love your characters. 🤣

      Hey, that’s great that you don’t remember the last time! 😛 For me, the last time was when I was reading an excerpt from story online and I just couldn’t get through it because of how romanticized the hero was. 😬😅 Ohh, I need to read their books!!! (The only book I’ve read of Michaela’s was Back To Me, and that one was incredible.)

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  5. Great post, Saraina! I totally agree with you!!!!! My most favorite characters/heroes are defiantly the not-perfect ones! Excellent points, keep up the good work!

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  6. I definitely agree with this post! Nothing annoys me more than a perfect hero (except for a perfect heroine). Tho surprisingly enough I do really like Sir Galahad in the King Arthur legends (like the only perfect character I like haha 😂) But honestly the reasons you listed above are oftentimes why I tend to have villains as my favorite characters 😅

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    1. Yes, there’s nothing worse than a perfect main character, hero or heroine! *gasps* You know what, I was actually going to bring up some mythological heroes like him as an exception! There’s something timeless and noble about them, and they’re more of an ideal rather than someone we’re meant to deeply relate to, and they serve a purpose of their own, I think. LOL! That’s so funny!

      Thank you for reading, Kay! ❤

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  9. I don’t really read romance *hides under table hoping Grace didn’t hear* XD. But I totally get what you’re saying (now I want to see a hero whose ears look funny turning red when embarrassed XD… actually, not a bad idea *makes mental note for future story*).

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    1. LOL! *tugs the tablecloth down so she can’t see you 😜* It can probably carry over to heroes not specifically in romance too! (SAME! I will have to read that story if you write it. XD)

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  12. I love this!!!! This is truth right here! And it’s true for more than just romance, all characters need this kind of authenticity. Those are always my favorite characters when they have flaws and quirks that make them *real*. More writers need to hear what you said in this post!

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    1. 👏 THANK YOU! Yess, definitely applies to more than romance! Exactly! Aw, thank you for saying that…while I was writing it, I felt kinda sheepish because the advice to give heroes flaws is far from original 😂 so I’m glad you think that it still needs to be said XD

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  13. Girl, you had me sold at roasty. ;P

    But seriously I CANNOT STRESS HOW MUCH I AGREE WITH EVERY SINGLE THING IN THIS POST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am definitely above and beyond irritated with the overly perfect male love interest. Like we get it. The girl is lucky and we should just all be jealous cuz those men aren’t real. XDD I’m all about reflecting reality in writing so seriously I just LOVE this post so much and I’m 100% with you!!! You rant on, sister!!! I like broken, flawed boys who I can get behind, rooting for, and hoping they have just as much of a meaningful character arc as the heroine!!! So yes THANK YOU for sharing this post, sister!!!

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    1. HAHA! 😛

      Aghhhhh thank you, girl!!!! I KNOW RIGHT? *facepalm* It just does not reflect reality in any way whatsoever! YES! 👏👏👏 Aww, thank you!!! I’m so glad you liked this post!!! 😊 ❤

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